Don’t plan every second, unless you want some unhappy attendees

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Don’t plan every second, unless you want some unhappy attendees

Some words of advice from a disgruntled delegate

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By Meeting Boy
Published: April 27, 2011

MeetingBoy is the secret online identity of a corporate worker driven mad by buzzwords, status meetings, bullies and hypocrites. He’s amassed a following of over 80,000 coworkers for his rants on Twitter as @MeetingBoy. Follow him on his website or on Facebook.

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When I go to a conference or corporate meeting off-site for a few days, it is important to have an agenda so things get done, but please, please, please stop planning every single minute. I know your job is to plan the meeting, but when you over-plan it, I will hate you for it. Why?

1. Part of the value of such events is the time attendees get to talk to each other. When you have something going every minute, then I won’t get to talk to people. Strengthening relationships with people I’m meeting face-to-face for the first time is of real value.

I finally got to meet Mark from Chicago, whom I only talk with on the phone (though he’s not as tall as he sounds).

2. People will keep waiting for their chance to talk to each other. If they don’t get that chance, they’ll start talking through whatever it is you’ve got planned. It’s like when recess in school gets canceled — the kids have to put that energy somewhere. You don’t want your organized meeting of grown-ups to devolve into a rowdy classroom of kids acting up.

Don’t cancel recess unless you want a food fight.

3. I’ll play hooky. If I want to talk to that guy from the San Francisco office that I see once a year at these things, then we’re going to talk. And when we don’t see a time to do it, we’ll just do it now. At the bar. And we’re not coming back. Don’t be fooled into thinking you have a captive audience.

My boss isn’t here, so fat chance I’m going to sit in some seminar while the bar is open. All I need to do now is figure out how to expense it.

4. No one likes to be micromanaged. When you plan every second of my life, even for two to three days, I’m going to resent you for it. And act out. And that’s not just me being a surly jerk — that’s human nature. Ignore at your own peril.

When’s the last time you thanked someone for micromanaging you? Never, that’s when.

5. Part of why people go to these things is because they are a boondoggle, at least in part. Now, yes, it’s true that it has to be a legitimate business function so that we can justify the registration cost to our bosses, but if there’s no a chance for us to relax and buy a few drinks (and maybe a round of golf) on the company dime, then we may not spend too much effort selling it to our bosses. And they won’t send us unless we ask them to.

According to Trip Advisor, the hotel at the convention is in a dry county. Maybe I don’t need to go.

6. If I don’t enjoy myself, I’m not going to convince my boss that I need the time off to go to your event next year. Spending three days at your conference doesn’t mean I will have less work waiting for me when I go back. I’m sure I’m not the only one whose coverage at the job amounts to taking messages and putting things on hold until I come back. On the list of meetings that are easy to opt out of, things that are expensive and take time away from the office top the list.

Unfortunately, last year’s corporate retreat was monopolized by senior management spouting platitudes and patronizing stories about how most people aren’t as good as they were when they moved up. Somehow everyone is too busy to go to this year’s.

Join the discussion

Happy Hour Says:

2011-04-27 13:53:16

Dear Meeting Boy, Well said! Thank you for taking the time to put your rant into writing. It was fun to read and offers some great feedback that we can all use to plan better events. Thanks! John P.S. DEFINITELY skip the meeting being held in the dry county. A meeting without alcohol is like wearing ear plugs to a concert!

blobert Says:

2011-04-28 13:55:00

I couldn't disagree more, Meetingboy. No, by all means, overplan. I hate having to think on my own. After 20 years and two university diplomas perfecting my craft, I really need to have my free time as encapsulated with as many pointless presentations as possible so I don't, god forbid, use my creativity and end up talking to other people about things other than "are you going to eat that cocktail weenie" or "sure is hot / cold today". Besides, I want to make sure I use every penny of the conference fee paid for by my employer as effectively as possible. I'd hate to think my employer has sent me to this presentation to enrich MY SELF! This is for my company. God bless them.

Adrian Segar Says:

2011-04-28 15:35:14

I think there's another way to design meetings that avoids this problem. First, the conferences I've been facilitating the last twenty years are participant-driven, and attendees have structured time to learn about each other and make connections right at the start. That sets the expectation that these activities are important and normal for the event. Second, through the process I've developed, participants create, at the event the conference program they want, based on their interests and the expertise and experience of the group. I've seen participants decide to spend time going ocean canoeing together, taking a walk directed by naturalists in the group, or arranging an informal tour of a local facility related to the conference topic, etc. Such activities allow plenty of opportunities for desired conversations to happen. Third, at the start of the event, I tell attendees we're going to treat them like adults. We will generate a full program for our time together, but we expect that each person will want to take time out of the sessions to have those one-to-one conversations that are, as you point out Meeting Boy, so important. By simply giving people permission to do this (and some attractive places for them to do it) you can reduce the pressure that many people feel, and resent, to be in sessions throughout the conference. Using this approach, it's possible to "plan every second" and yet avoid the pitfalls you mention. The difference is, of course, that the participants are doing the planning, not the meeting organizers. The meeting organizers' role then becomes one of creating and facilitating the meeting process, rather than its content and structure.

MeetingBoy Says:

2011-04-29 18:03:27

Adrian: So you're saying that the schedule you put out is presented to the attendees as an a la carte, not an expectation to be at every session. I like this idea. When it's a corporate meeting, do the higher-ups accept this?

Adrian Segar Says:

2011-05-01 09:01:19

In response to your question, MeetingBoy, there is usually a big difference between the goals of corporate meetings and the peer meetings I design. The former revolve around business goals, the latter tend to be focused on the individual goals of the attendees. Obviously, if management decides it's vital for employees to be at every session of a business meeting, the employees are going to be there, or face the consequences, and it's in circumstances like these that your comments are completely appropriate. Business meeting organizers often feel the need to cram in as many content-oriented sessions as possible (after all, it's so expensive flying all our employees in) and overlook the real needs you describe for connections, relaxation, and enjoyment. So the trick is to recognize this reality by clearly identifying the sessions at which management wants full attendance and those where attendees can use their adult judgment, and also building adequate time into the schedule to handle the issues you mention.

Stella Collins Says:

2011-10-10 11:00:11

I've just been to an unconference which sounds very similar to the process Adrian describes. It was great to feel you had a chance to input into the agenda and the individual meetings. The only pity was not being able to go to all the sessions (but that's true of normal conferences). The big difference was in the level of conversation - it was more diverse and deeper because people were discussing what they needed or wanted to talk about rather than what was on the agenda. Even if the organisers have asked people what they want on the agenda it may be what they asked for last year or even last month (conferences usually take a while to organise). And I think we all felt like adults instead of school children. Early on someone said that to discuss what you wanted to discuss all you had to do was contribute. Lots of contributions made for lots of interesting results.